Why today's nerf guns are causing childhood obesity

I just met my boss's children. The boys are 12 and 10. They started playing with the office nerf guns (yes those exist) and somehow we ended up talking about the differences between old school 90s nerf  guns and the ones today. This progressed to Tamagotchi's. I brought them up and one of my fellow co-worker's who is my age clapped with glee. Who didn't love tamagochi's? At some point, every kid in my glass when I was in 4th/5th grade carried around little plastic eggs with tiny screens on them — in these screens lived our hearts, our pets, our lives, our very own Tamagotchi. We loved them, we listened to their tiny electronic screams of malnourishment, and we occasionally forgot to pick up their poop for long enough that they died a tortured, poop-filled death. Or sometimes we just stopped feeding them to see what would happen (what? it wasn't just me who did that. Stop judging). They were perhaps our first foray into the life-consuming world of electronics and self-absorption, later to be fully manifested by Facebook.

The two boys had no idea what we were talking about. Probably because now a days when you are 10 you already have an ipod,ipad,iphone, or some other kind of cell phone. Well I got a tamagotchi before I had an email address that should tell you how old I am.

I just realized that when I was in 4th grade FIFTEEN YEARS AGO. I'm old.

I'm going to show my age here for a moment but when we were discussing nerf guns everyone (and by everyone I mean everyone in the office who was in their 20s or older) decided that kid's today are wimps. Look at the average nerf gun from 1995. This is the type of gun my brother and I would have played with:

Simple. But deadly. You had to pump in order to fire and it couldn't go that far and it wasn't that accurate. so if you wanted to hit someone you had to work with it. this taught kids in my generation how to plan and race forward to your opponent with no fear. It also ensured that we had to get off of our lazy butts and run around in order to inflict pain on someone.

Now let's look at what the average nerf gun is today.

No you are not mistaken. those nerf guns are a sniper rifle and a machine gun. they can also hit up to like 300 yards apparently so now a days kids can just plop right down on the ground and hit their opponent while eating. and they hold a lot more ammo then the nerf guns I grew up with.

When people wonder why kid's today are lazy and fat they don't need to look any farther then nerf guns.